Over the years, I’ve worked with so many people who are smart, successful, deeply loved by friends and community — yet quietly struggle in their love lives. They often keep relationships private, afraid of being misunderstood or judged. They give generously, accommodate endlessly, and try to be “easy” — only to end up drained, resentful, and wondering how they got here again.

From the outside, it doesn’t make sense.
Shouldn’t they have it all figured out by now?

If you’re here, you already know the answer:
it’s not that simple.

This work matters to me because I was one of those people.

My own journey began with a breakup that sent shockwaves through my life. At the time, I was young, successful, freshly graduated with my master’s degree from Columbia, and just beginning my career as a therapist. On paper, everything looked great. Inside was a different story... I was a total mess.

That breakup hurt so deeply because I had tolerated disrespect, made myself smaller, and avoided asking for what I truly wanted out of fear of being rejected or seen as “too much.” Instead of honoring myself, I went along with what he wanted while it quietly tore me apart inside.

When it ended, I felt discarded, unimportant, and embarrassed that I had stayed as long as I did. I remember thinking, I’m a therapist — shouldn’t I know better than this?

Friends told me to forget about him — that he was a jerk and not worth my time. Maybe they were right. But labeling him an asshole wasn’t going to change anything.

What I needed to understand was how I got there in the first place.

Why This Work is Personal

The Moment Everything Clicked

That period was one of the lowest points of my life. I felt so ashamed and down on myself that I couldn’t even bring myself to post a simple selfie. I was terrified he might see it and judge me for it, confirming everything I feared about myself

One day, while at a barbecue after panicking for a half hour about posting said selfie when I should have been enjoying my afternoon with friends, it all clicked- I was afraid because I had allowed myself to believe all of the awful things about myself he had projected on to me

What else did I believe? What other unhealthy beliefs was I unconsciously bringing to the table, thinking it was true love?

That July afternoon would become a turning point in my life. I was determined to understand my relationship map, how I got here, and what got me to stay for as long as I did.

The More I Worked on Myself, the More I Realized I Wasn't Alone

Before becoming a coach, I worked full-time as a therapist specializing in intimate partner violence and community mental health. One thing became abundantly clear:
the people we attach to, and the patterns we repeat shape our lives in profound ways.

The more I did this work, the more I began to see it everywhere. I’ve seen countless smart, successful people who have everything to offer keep themselves small, hide who they're seeing because they know that the people who love them won’t accept their partner, and they believe lies and abandon themselves when it doesn't have to be this way.

Armed with my clinical training, this new experience and insight, I was determined to do things differently. When I was going through it, there wasn't a lot of good information out there, so I set out to help others who were where I once was.

I created Killing Cupid because at the time, I thought I was doing everything right. I strove to be helpful, kind, always thoughtful and the best girlfriend I could be, hoping it would turn into the love I always wanted. The reality though, is that all the things I thought I was “supposed”to do, weren't coming from me- and following those rules took me down a path that caused me to abandon and betray myself.

Being stuck on an ex or choosing the wrong person isn’t a personal failure. It’s a pattern you were taught, and it’s a pattern you can unlearn.

That’s the work we do here.

You Don't Have to Do this Alone

I offer free discovery calls for people who are curious about breaking old relationship patterns and building something different. We’ll talk through what’s been coming up for you and see whether my approach feels like a fit.

Frequently Asked Questions

What Does Your Coaching Process Look Like?

We’ll start off with an introductory call so we can decide on your goals and set your intentions for our time together. Once we have that nailed down, we’ll start the program together. Every week we’ll have a one hour session together, and you’ll use the rest of the week to complete the exercises. I’ll be available to support you via email in between sessions.

How is your coaching different from therapy?

Therapy is the open-ended treatment of mental health conditions and emotional issues and is primarily focused on healing and introspection. As a coach, I am here to help you achieve your goals through tangible solutions. While I am a licensed therapist, and due to the nature of the work we will be doing, it is only natural that we will have discussions around emotions. My focus is on helping you understand your blocks and making a plan and offering support to move through them.

What are your qualifications?

I have been a licensed therapist since 2014, I have my MSW from Columbia University with a focus in advanced clinical practice. I have worked in private practice and community health clinics, as well as helping hundreds of clients heal and improve their relationship patterns through coaching over the years.

Do I need coaching if I’m already seeing a therapist?

Yes, you can absolutely combine therapy and coaching. In fact, it's recommended for maximum impact! Working through a coaching program can bring in new insights that a therapist will be able to provide in depth support for.

How long do I need to see results?

That depends on your goals and commitment to the program. My programs are designed to give you practical, actionable tools that you can start using right away, but they only work if you are committed to consistently implementing them.

Do you offer any free resources or consultations?

Yes! In fact, before we start working together I always have a free consultation to see if we are the right fit. You can read my blog or follow me on quora for updates and more information about the work I do. If you have any questions you are also always welcome to email me directly (nobody reads my emails but me).